HAPPY CNY AND BELATED VALENTINES DAY

HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR :) and A HAPPY BELATED VALENTINES DAY ! :)

if you're single and no one is giving you any hugs or kisses on valentines day.. well.. do kindly accept this free HUG of mine :)

*HUG ATTACK ! *

NIX LOVES YOU :)

as history repeats itself :(

Breathe

I constantly told myself

When I'm over the moon

Clenched with anger

Disappointed

Melancholic

Was all I could do

until everything turned chaotic

If only

you'd figure out.

Are your visions that daze?

Is it so effortful to fathom out?

All these years

I withstand the rigidness

implacableness

incompliantness

No more

Enough.

Breathe

But there's no air

Why is it so problematical for me?

I can't take it no more

NO MORE.

Though it's hard for me to breathe

I'll continue to go forward

You shall not be an obstacle in life

Oh God

Have mercy on us sinners

I pray that one day

He'll realize

and come to figure out

how we truly felt.

Breathe

was all I could do

to flush out all worries

to move on.

Life.. NOW

Pissed?

Clenched in anger?

Non-stop gritting of my teeth?

I have absolutely no idea what to feel..

Disappointed? - maybe..

Sad? -supposedly..

Angry? - guess so..

Happy?- could be..

Tired?- definitely..

Just feel like I'm kind of in mood confusion..

Things like this get along with me well, and in the other way some other times..

It's amusing .. sometimes.. but when it gets over the boundary.. everything changes..

This week had been kinda rough .. with all the topical exams and everything clamering up my mind...

the fact that chinese new year is next week and the thought of can't go to shopping until friday is making matters worse.. -.- ''

Bought the clothes already, but not pants or shoes yet.. what's new year without a complete new set of clothes?

Every year, I always stumble into people like this .. asking this random question over and over again.. but well, it's no harm done.. you're just curious that's all .. and wanted to know more :P

the question is :" do you celebrate chinese new year? " well, I do .. as a matter of fact.. :) My mum is a chinese.. so I don't see the reason why I'm not celebrating.. :P

Topical tests.. some were awesome, some were terrible and some were.. just .. average.. -.- so far, my overall comment on my performance.. its just OK.. nothing more than that.. Form 4's hectic life is starting to kick in.. and the headache and insomniac i get every day made me felt that I aged 5 years more .... terrible eh? no doubt if I had any wrinkles.. -.- which I hope I won't get any.. So far for topical exams.. I really wanted to thank God for being with me throughout this whole week, I couldn't have made it this far without him.. even if I did made it.. my brain would die .. totally brain dead.. Thank you Lord, for giving me the strength and confidence in my exam so that I could achieve better results and prove to myself and everybody else that form 4 life isn't that difficult to cope with :)

Stress+ tonnes of homework= psycho..

well, it's kinda true though.. believe me... I never faced stress that much when I was only facing PMR.. :P there's this wacky dude sitting in front of me.. who goes all psycho when he has LOTS of stress.. to all those in 4s2.. you know who I'm mentioning .. xD He'll shriek and scream and yell like some wacky dude who just strike lotto -.- everyone was laughing like mad.. and believe me, I laughed till i cried.. his actions are a little bit.. indescribable.. so I'll try to record a video next time :)

I'm proud with the progression :) everyday my burden is well liften up.. not so many things to worry about :) the juniors are my inspiration to make me move forward each and everyday.. though we may not know what God will bring us tomorrow.. their belief and confidence in me .. gave me every good reason to strive till the end, though it's difficult.. the outcome is bliss :) Juniors are better than seniors.. *awkward* Well, no doubt.. these people are trained since young :) kinda proud of them though.. xD make me prouder! xD

Well, enough about the on goings on my life.. As you all could have noticed.. i changed the layout of my blog.. :) what do you think? nice? pretty? beautiful? exquisite? spontaneous? well, your comments are highly appreciated :)

Chinese New year is finally coming.. :) Finally could load off that heavy bag off my shoulders.. relax and wish I could just hibernate like there's no tomorrow :)

Till the next time :)

the caterpillar :)

this is dedicated ..

FOR YOU..

TO YOU..

forever and always..

A caterpillar lies in his cocoon,

all warm and snuggled up in a corner..

wondering all by himself..

when will the right time be for him ?

to break free of the tiny space surrounding him..

all lonely.. and miserable..

hearing the rhythm of the river ..

flowing down the hill..

pitter, patter.. pitter.. patter..

what a lovely sound to all ears...

the sound that brings peace and tranquility..

towards the core of your heart...

The warm sun..

what a lovely sight indeed..

standing proudly..

emmitting it's bright and shining light down on earth..

covering the silhouette of stars behind it's bright light..

and darkness shrieks..

slowly dying away..

The night sky...

it reaps across the valley..

the sun slowly descended beneath the hills ..

washing the whole landscape abruptly ..

and stars started to silhouette against the night sky..

with the moon trailing far behind..

what a pretty sight for all eyes to see..

sprakly .. shinning stars..

how I wish you could shine my life ..

A leaf..

it's not PINK..

it's not RED..

it's green..

the colour of nature..

Admist of all the hardships of nature..

the leaf stays strong..

protecting the cocoon beneath it..

against all evil of nature ..

As the sun rises..

the rain stops pouring..

the trees started to spread out it's branches..

birds start chirping..

welcoming the bright sun..

the caterpillar in the cocoon had enough..

"it's time" he muttered..

he wiggled and waggled out the cocoon,

but the cocoon remains strong..

holding him back..

with every last bit of energy in him..

he pushes against the cocoon..

and finally bursts out of it..

showing off his new wings..

proudly.. and fluttered away..

where he'll begin a new life ...

in HOPE

My dear friend..

it's not about how anyone think of you..

it's about how you think of yourself. :)

Never ever let anyone influence you in any way..

you're like the caterpillar..

unsure. confused. puzzled.

being held back by the cocoon..

didn't have the freedom to make your own decisions..

unable to strive out...

lonely and miserable...

you are like the dark sky..

dark. unable to see a thing.

lost in your own ways..

NOTHING..

completely nothing.

but with God,

and the supports of your friends..

we will be like the shinning stars..

guiding you out of darkness..

lightening the true path of your life..

God has given you many chances to break free..

it's not about whether or not can you break free..

but it's a matter whether do you WANT to break free?

my friend..

it's still never too late to turn back..

God allows U-turns..

Remember that.

in a tunnel where there is nothing but darkness..

at the end of the other tunnel..

there;s always light...

HOPE.. will be there..

HOPE will be there to help you

HOPE will be there to save you..

alas..

I pray that you'll start to live the life you promised me ..

and be the good girl everyone knows..

xD

still didn't get the picture?

-.-

FINE..

conclusion..

JOLENE NG.. DONT PONTENG CLASS! :P

:)

yippee!! it's my first post of the year 2010...! :)

and can you believe that i didn't have the time to blog for the past month? that's just sad :( very sad.. :'( * MAJOR SAD FACE*

well, since young.. I've been looking forward to form 4 life.. well, I thought it'll be fun and all that.. but .. i was WRONG.. Form 4 life is real hectic.. and I didn't feel this only until orientation was over.. orientation was a blast :) definitely will miss it :( had fun.. LOTS of fun... new students had FUN too.. so did the AJK's :) though tiring, but the effort we put out for this orientation was really worth it :) we love you new students :)

ok.. to summarize what I did for the past month was.. Orientation to begin with.. played lots of games.. and also talks from the teachers, principal, vice principal :) new students were co-operative with me :) their co-operation while playing games really did touched me :) it goes to show that when they wanted something badly.. they'll do anything to achieve it... even if it means working together as a team :)

ok, next. HOMEWORK. To be honest, since form 1 to 3.. I never actually did completed my homework.. Don't get me wrong.. I did do my homework.. but sometimes never did completed it >.<>

everything now is all just topsy turvy.. everything is going not as planned.. and nothing seemed right.. >.<>

Biology is fun :) and why? the main reason is the teacher that is fun.. her " FUN" isn't that kind of fun you're expecting me to say.. her fun is more towards like.. insulting students.. but her tone and way of insulting was just so funny that the whole class laughed.. that's why biology is just so interesting.. xD but the memorising is killing my brain cells bit by bit..

Moral teacher.. D: nothing i can say bout him.. but 5 words i wish i could say to him are " GET OUT OF MY FACE"

Add maths.. is literally driving me up the ceiling.. yeah, wall isn't enough.. but the ceiling ... xD I just don't get it.. I know the concept and all that, but when it comes to exam.. everything in my mind just turned blank ...

concluding.. form 4 life made me felt like i aged 5 years more every day... so yeah.. you know what i mean.. >.<

no more touching the laptop.. ( but i still do anyway :P )

no more tv.. ( watched a little still :P )

no more going out.. ( kinda.. but what the heck? parkson clothings aren't nice at all.. KL's clothings.. now we're talking :P)

CS-ers... MAKE ME PROUD :)

The End of the Finishing line..

Another year is about to flow by, and I must say, time do fly by real fast, it's like I don't even feel time flowing anymore, somehow it just managed to slip off my senses. Well, I guess what the saying was true.. time DO flow by fast especially when you're enjoying your wits out! xD

Well, I really hate this time of the year, saying goodbye to all the holidays, which were filled with cherished memories, accompanied by movie manias... :) ... also with tearful moments. Well, form 3 life is over, coming to an end, the finish line is near, the end, no more, never coming back again. :'(

I still can't admit that I'm going to form 4 next year, which is kinda like " woah, I'm THAT old already" since I first stepped in to school, I always looked forward to form 4, and until now, I have no absolute positive reason why.. O-o. Then, got to start thinking about my future career I'm pursuing, and where to study..... scholarships... Gosh TIME! don't go by any faster! :( seemed a little too fast... REALLY... my flashback still flashes back during my form 1 time... how did I grow up so fast? TIME.... the enemy .. of most mankind xD

Well, PMR results were out.. satisfied everybody? I don't know what to feel really... overjoyed? astounded? astonished? shocked? overloading emotions? =.= definitely nothing like any of that.. surprisingly, i felt kind of neutral.. stupid darn chinese, I'm SO glad that you're over and out of my life.. no longer shall you hold me back, no longer shall you dwell in me, no longer a threat .. no longer pulling me back.. FEAR ME! for you no longer clench my freedom, I'm a free girl now! FEAR, you're my past... do me a favour and stay there.. imprisoned in my past forever!! MUAHAHAHAAH!!! man i feel free! xDDD! I always wanted to say that.... xD

watched Alvin and the Chipmunks 2 today....cute, definitely... and a lot of AW's.... :) Theodore was SO CUTE! xD I squeaked a little in the cinema.. until mitch shushed me up =.= ... oh well... it was nice :)

UH... school tomorrow :( and it's not even 2010 yet! :( some of the mallo's are seperated from us, but hopefully their transfers are a success.. :) I pray to God that they would succeed with the transfer and may whosoever in charge enlighten them :) SCHOOL UNIFORM.. :( I'm not used to wearing uniform ler.. :( sad...

TIME! SLOW DOWN! if only you could freeze in time, and let everything just last forever.. good times to remember :)

oh well, still thinking about my new year's resolutions... well, I sure did came up with SOMETHING..

• Good results.. it's always a must anyway ... =.=
• be more daring a little, not shrewing up like a nutshell...
• Train Cs ... hopefully I pray that we'll reach towards nationals.. well, miracles do happen when you least expect it to happen :)
• Learn HOW TO USE makeup.. =.=

SO FAR..... i think that's kind it... xD

well, like I said, miracles DO HAPPEN when you least expect it to happen :)

ADIOUS 2009... 2010 here we come :)

of love

As the night started to wash across the sky..

Stars silhouetted against the dark sky..

Followed by the moon trailing behind..

It enhances the night sky..

bringing it to life..

The moon shone brightly in the night..

it's brightness penetrates through my curtains...

As I gaze out of the window..

What a pretty sight I see..

And only came to realize that Christmas is near.

Green, Red! are all the colours I see..

Decorations hung across every inch as far as my eyes could see..

Christmas songs were played throughout the shopping malls..

adding a little Christmas spirit to my heart..

My heart leaped with joy..

like a metronome that'll beat non stop..

" Christmas is near " I muttered to myself happily..

It's funny really..

That no one actually truly understands the fathom of Christmas..

Some are in for the presents..

Some are in to spread the joy of Christmas..

Some are in just to have fun..

But these people are missing the point here!

The birth of the Lord is coming!

A savior who was sent by God to come down to earth to save us from suffering..

A savior, his son.. his only son ...

I lay back at the sofa flickering through the channels ..

Christmas themed movies were played..

It ached my heart really..

to see what people think of Christmas..

Christmas inclined towards Santa Claus more than our savior.

I often asked myself

Why isn't the world teaching the children of God about the true meaning of Christmas?

But instead blurred up our minds with the selfish teachings of the earth.

Snow started falling,

pattering against my shoulders.

Flowers, Roses were given out by the park..

I took a boquet of flower..

As I thought that my house needs a little colour..

I walked to the park ..

and I heard the sound of carolings echoed throughout

As I was walking..

I saw statues of the 3 wise men, Mary, Joseph and Baby Jesus..

I walked up towards the statue of Baby Jesus,

his smile overturned..

My heart was filled with sadness...

I said a silent prayer..

and placed a boquet or roses in front of him..

and the frown flipped the other way up..

that smile overwhelmed me with joy :)

and I could never take that smile of my mind..

because I felt love ..

Weird, how one smile changes a person's feeling.. :)

and how a little sense of care made us felt love..

Well, that's Christmas..

Christmas isn't about the presents you find under your tree..

But to celebrate the coming of Christ! :)

And the best time of the year to be with your family and friends..

It's not about receiving..

but it's about giving..

People, do not let earthly teachings blocked you against the true meaning of Christmas..

Alas.. I'd like to take the opportunity to say

:" Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year "

from the Dominic's :)